We have been so busy this week. We went out every night but one in the last 7 days. We are looking forward to staying home this week and relaxing at home.
We are very thankful for all of our family and friends that we have made down here. We are truly blessed by all the people in our lives. Thanks to all of you who make our lives so special!
On a side note, I took myself off of my medicine, "happy pills", and have really been struggling. We do not have insurance so I did not want to burden our family with having to pay for a doctor's appointment and a prescription. I am incredibly frustrated with myself for being so weak and for being so impatient, not understanding my children's needs, and crying sometimes for no reason. Losing my job last year really took a toll on me and I do not think I have fully come to grips with it. I think about it a lot and wonder what I should have done differently. I also think about the incredible opportunity I have being able to stay at home with my beautiful children. I am really so lucky and it is amazing to me how forgetful I can be and how I can be so ungrateful.
For those of you who read this and know me please say a prayer for me. I do not like asking for help, as most of you would know who really know me, but I need it. I need to know that what I am doing is the right thing. That I can be a good mom and a good wife and not make my family feel bad. When your child tells you he just wants you to be happy again, well it makes my heart break that I can have that effect on my children. Also, I am really struggling with making true friends down here. I have let some people get the best of me and I am really struggling to not be angry with them and myself.
I also apologize if you are reading this and are thoroughly confused. I am tired, frustrated, and wanting to be happy for my wonderful life God has given me.
I pray for all of you and hope that whatever comes your way makes you happy!